Sunday, October 14, 2012
Where am I
This past two months have been really tough for me. My expectations of how things would work out where in retrospect unrealistic. I figured getting a job would be no problem I have a good resume a good portfolio how hard can it be. Then I figured once I get a job I can join up for classes again and things would carry on with hardly a beat skipped. I relearned something over the last two months. Accepting just being good is accepting a life of mediocrity. In my career field there is a lot of competition so being average means you don't stick out. With this in mind I have been creating new projects as well as finishing old projects that desperately need my attention. This time I am taking a more critical eye to my work.
I have also been thinking about my training or lack there of lately and it sucks to me. Kung Fu has been a constant in my life for the eight years give or take. Still knowing the positive effects it has on me I still make excuses to not train regularly if I am not in the kwoon. I tend to think of myself as alone all the way out here and that is not true I still can engage with team members through their blogs and through kwoon talk. I have actively made myself absent from the kwoon. The one thing I have been still doing is my push ups but even that is not enough. I have to re-establish my tracking system as well as revisit my forms which have been mostly gathering dust the past months.
Craig Janzen
Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada
Saturday, October 13, 2012
I'm Thankful For...
Last weekend our family took off to the mountains for a few
days. Even though we saw the forecast of
white and cooler temperatures, we were troopers. What started out as a ‘I’m not sure we aren’t
going to freeze’ idea turned into an absolutely wonderful and relaxing weekend.
The mountains, for our entire family, is a place not only
that we all crave to go to but one that relaxes and rejuvenates us. The further west we went on Friday morning
the more snow we saw along the roadside.
When we got to our destination we were snow free with the sun
shining. The entire weekend I was in
absolute awe of the blessings and the opportunities I have. Looking around at my family and the
incredible mountain scenery, I couldn’t help but think how we can so easily
take for granted everything that God has given us. As our family sat around the fire having our
thanksgiving barbequed salmon (didn’t want to use all the propane on a turkey,
might need that for heat at night), we got in the discussion of what we are
thankful for. We live in a fast paced
world. Not enough time is given to truly
relaxing and appreciating, but when you sit back and truly think about what we
are so fortunate to have, how can a person not just say WOW!
Alana Regier
Will I Ever Get It?!
There is something that has been on my mind for months now, and last night Sifu Brinker hit the nail right on the head. I know what I have been missing in my kung fu all these years, and this is the one big thing, that in my mind, separates me from the rest of the black belts. It makes me feel very insufficient, and incomplete as a martial artist. That it!!!! That's the word!! Incomplete. I feel incomplete. Without being complete, how can I ever expect to attain mastery?
I can learn a technique, practice a technique, and remember a technique. But I have so much difficulty analyzing a technique. This has always been a struggle for me, and it makes me feel almost like I am not smart enough for the real martial arts. (for lack of a better way to explain it). Last night Sifu Brinker asked us what we think of when we do a form. To be honest, I think a lot about my stances and keeping them low. I think about my shoulders and try not to hunch them up. I sometimes think about my arm techniques, but until now, I didn't really realize how little I think about them. That is probably why I keep bending my wrists on my punches.
I admit that I don't think much about the 6 harmonies, and the reason is exactly as Sifu Brinker said last night. It seems like it is above my head to understand them, so why bother trying. What a sucky attitude that is. I do, however, when I am doing my forms, often, but not always, try to focus on my feet drawing energy from below. I can't be sure, but I think this is part of the 6 harmonies. I left classes last night with the conviction to research and see if there is anything out there to help me better understand the 6 harmonies.
I am not sure why I don't analyze by kung fu more. Well, I think I might have a couple of ideas, but it is embarrassing to admit. I think it is because of being lazy. Not taking the time to slow down and think about it. Why? Because it's too hard. Which comes to the other reason. I am not really smart when it comes to that kind of stuff. Velocity of what? Interception where? This also bothers me in the way that it makes me lack in a lot of areas with my teaching. I get terrified every time a student puts up their hand to ask me a question, for fear that it will be a "thinking" kind of question. What move comes after what? I can usually answer those. But something like the dynamics of a technique? AAAGGGHHHHH!!
I have always admired people who understand the innards of the martial arts. I am more of a doer, than a thinker, but as a second degree black belt, I had better start learning how to become a thinker. I have never really figured out how. Without someone teaching me, how do I learn all this stuff? Where do I find the information? Online? With my own analyzing? Training harder? Doing more defense techniques? Sifu Brinker says that doing forms will help with some of it. I do forms a lot. A LOT! I must not be in the right frame of mind when I do them, maybe.
I remember as an orange belt being told over and over again to visualize my opponent when I do a form. That too was extremely difficult for me. I guess after awhile, I gave up trying. Perhaps slowing down my forms will help, but that too is hard for me. I like to keep moving and I like to move fast. I have come to realize lately that what my kids have been telling me for years may have some truth to it. I have a real hard time being idle. I don't like to sit still. When I am idle or slow down, I have a much harder time focusing. This is a very interesting observation for me. One would think that with slowing down, one would have much more focus. When I slow down, far too many thoughts enter my head for me to focus on any one of them. When I am memorizing Mastery, I have my headphones on with music playing. This helps me to stay completely focused on my thoughts of memorizing.
Anyways, I am just thinking out loud, and going on forever. This is definitely a topic to work on, and to "think" more about.
I can learn a technique, practice a technique, and remember a technique. But I have so much difficulty analyzing a technique. This has always been a struggle for me, and it makes me feel almost like I am not smart enough for the real martial arts. (for lack of a better way to explain it). Last night Sifu Brinker asked us what we think of when we do a form. To be honest, I think a lot about my stances and keeping them low. I think about my shoulders and try not to hunch them up. I sometimes think about my arm techniques, but until now, I didn't really realize how little I think about them. That is probably why I keep bending my wrists on my punches.
I admit that I don't think much about the 6 harmonies, and the reason is exactly as Sifu Brinker said last night. It seems like it is above my head to understand them, so why bother trying. What a sucky attitude that is. I do, however, when I am doing my forms, often, but not always, try to focus on my feet drawing energy from below. I can't be sure, but I think this is part of the 6 harmonies. I left classes last night with the conviction to research and see if there is anything out there to help me better understand the 6 harmonies.
I am not sure why I don't analyze by kung fu more. Well, I think I might have a couple of ideas, but it is embarrassing to admit. I think it is because of being lazy. Not taking the time to slow down and think about it. Why? Because it's too hard. Which comes to the other reason. I am not really smart when it comes to that kind of stuff. Velocity of what? Interception where? This also bothers me in the way that it makes me lack in a lot of areas with my teaching. I get terrified every time a student puts up their hand to ask me a question, for fear that it will be a "thinking" kind of question. What move comes after what? I can usually answer those. But something like the dynamics of a technique? AAAGGGHHHHH!!
I have always admired people who understand the innards of the martial arts. I am more of a doer, than a thinker, but as a second degree black belt, I had better start learning how to become a thinker. I have never really figured out how. Without someone teaching me, how do I learn all this stuff? Where do I find the information? Online? With my own analyzing? Training harder? Doing more defense techniques? Sifu Brinker says that doing forms will help with some of it. I do forms a lot. A LOT! I must not be in the right frame of mind when I do them, maybe.
I remember as an orange belt being told over and over again to visualize my opponent when I do a form. That too was extremely difficult for me. I guess after awhile, I gave up trying. Perhaps slowing down my forms will help, but that too is hard for me. I like to keep moving and I like to move fast. I have come to realize lately that what my kids have been telling me for years may have some truth to it. I have a real hard time being idle. I don't like to sit still. When I am idle or slow down, I have a much harder time focusing. This is a very interesting observation for me. One would think that with slowing down, one would have much more focus. When I slow down, far too many thoughts enter my head for me to focus on any one of them. When I am memorizing Mastery, I have my headphones on with music playing. This helps me to stay completely focused on my thoughts of memorizing.
Anyways, I am just thinking out loud, and going on forever. This is definitely a topic to work on, and to "think" more about.
Friday, October 12, 2012
A Blank Screen
As I sit here I am trying to think of something to write about and basically my mind is blank. Not a bad thing, just is at the moment. I'm at Day 10 of the intensive portion of Quantum Leap and it's been intense. Not intense that it's been a kleenex session or that I emit fits of whatever, but intense that the focus is totally on me and what are my values, am I living my life from them, and what do I want? My moments have cycled from woohoo!! to "I have the energy of a rock" and everything in between. Totally normal for this type of course.
One thing that I have been doing a lot in this course is getting present to the present moment and staying there instead of camping out in the future. I am present at the torch because that is not the place to let one's mind wander. 5000 degrees of heat is a hello!!!! moment. Even picking a glass rod up at the wrong end at a "paultry" 700 degrees yanks one back from the future pretty fast.
Taking a step back to get perspective and a clear look at what forward looks like is pretty rewarding and gives reason as to why I'm going down this path. I make the decision as to where I want to go and make the moves in that direction and keep moving. How I get there isn't up to me as there's a much greater force in action with angles I haven't even though of. I've had stuff come from out of the blue and it's pretty amazing.
Well my screen on the computer is a little less blank. Does it make total sense? On some level it does.
Sherri Donohue
http://www.sherridlampworkglass.blogspot.ca/
One thing that I have been doing a lot in this course is getting present to the present moment and staying there instead of camping out in the future. I am present at the torch because that is not the place to let one's mind wander. 5000 degrees of heat is a hello!!!! moment. Even picking a glass rod up at the wrong end at a "paultry" 700 degrees yanks one back from the future pretty fast.
Taking a step back to get perspective and a clear look at what forward looks like is pretty rewarding and gives reason as to why I'm going down this path. I make the decision as to where I want to go and make the moves in that direction and keep moving. How I get there isn't up to me as there's a much greater force in action with angles I haven't even though of. I've had stuff come from out of the blue and it's pretty amazing.
Well my screen on the computer is a little less blank. Does it make total sense? On some level it does.
Sherri Donohue
http://www.sherridlampworkglass.blogspot.ca/
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Thankfulness! Gratefulness!!!!
I am grateful for so many things in my life;
First of all I am grateful to God, He is the reason for all the is good in my life and the obstacles that I need to overcome to grow.
I am grateful for my husband, he has supported and encouraged me for nearly twenty years. He always there for me as I attempt to be a better me, cheering me on and helping me out when I fall down.
I am grateful for my daughter, she believes that there is nothing that I can't do! What an amazing feeling that is!!
I am grateful for the life that I have, it is full of goodness and love. I have good friends, near and far, and I have family members that accept me for who I have become.
I am grateful for my job, I have been working with children and families for approx. 23 yrs, and they never cease to amaze me, their capacity to love one another and over-come diversity in order to be together is over-whelming at times.
I am grateful for my pet family, they make me laugh, cry and sigh with contentment. I love that I can have these animals in my life and they show me the true meaning of unconditional love. No matter how the rest of the world treats me, when I come home, I am greeted with so much love and excitement that all else is forgotten.
I am grateful for my kung fu family, I truly feel like I have found a place where I belong and I am completed accepted. I love my family. My goal is to pass that feeling on and treat each person that walks in the door with compassion and understanding so that they will experience the same feelings that I have.
I am grateful for the opportunities that I have had to volunteer in my community. I have gained so much empathy from our projects.
There are many more things that I am grateful for but that would make this a really long blog. My goal is to remind myself throughout the year, not only during Thanksgiving.
Those are my thoughts for this week.
http://mantismantle.blogspot.ca/
First of all I am grateful to God, He is the reason for all the is good in my life and the obstacles that I need to overcome to grow.
I am grateful for my husband, he has supported and encouraged me for nearly twenty years. He always there for me as I attempt to be a better me, cheering me on and helping me out when I fall down.
I am grateful for my daughter, she believes that there is nothing that I can't do! What an amazing feeling that is!!
I am grateful for the life that I have, it is full of goodness and love. I have good friends, near and far, and I have family members that accept me for who I have become.
I am grateful for my job, I have been working with children and families for approx. 23 yrs, and they never cease to amaze me, their capacity to love one another and over-come diversity in order to be together is over-whelming at times.
I am grateful for my pet family, they make me laugh, cry and sigh with contentment. I love that I can have these animals in my life and they show me the true meaning of unconditional love. No matter how the rest of the world treats me, when I come home, I am greeted with so much love and excitement that all else is forgotten.
I am grateful for my kung fu family, I truly feel like I have found a place where I belong and I am completed accepted. I love my family. My goal is to pass that feeling on and treat each person that walks in the door with compassion and understanding so that they will experience the same feelings that I have.
I am grateful for the opportunities that I have had to volunteer in my community. I have gained so much empathy from our projects.
There are many more things that I am grateful for but that would make this a really long blog. My goal is to remind myself throughout the year, not only during Thanksgiving.
Those are my thoughts for this week.
http://mantismantle.blogspot.ca/
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Judgement
I have been working on my judgement the past couple months. I'm getting better but a long to go to get to a state where my better judgement will become natural and ingrained in how I do things. For example, I love food and I always tend to eat more then I need. I have started to eat and order less food but I still tend to over because I finish the plates of my children. I have a problem food out, I think this comes from living in a country where we didn't have enough to eat when I was younger.
The past couple of weeks, I have been thinking about everything and what I have on my plate. And I'm exercising better judgement and not taking on so many things. I have already given up some of the things that I taken care of in the past for my Rotary club but there is still many things that I can not let go at tis time. Another thing is to prioritize my commitments and allocate time to do them.
I would like to apologize to my I Ho Chaun team members, I should have not taken a spot on the team without fully understanding the commitments and time required to complete the task. I have not been a good team mate and many of our failings as a team are because I wasn't committedt to you guys. I'm Sorry!
My family is first, then my office as Mayor, third is my restaurant and staff, fourth is my extended family, fifth on my list is Kung fu, then golf, etc. I will continue to training and be as involved as my time permits but for my NOW, Kung fu is not a priority.
wchoy74.blogspot.ca
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