Frustration

I've been wanting to write a journal entry for a couple of days but I didn't because my mindset was a bit negative and I wanted to wait until I shook it off. Well, that hasn't happened yet and I suppose the negative posts serve a purpose, just the same as the positive ones. I can look back and remember how I felt when I was low and also remember that it didn't last forever. You have to remember where you've come from to appreciate where you are. 

So, with all that said - I'm very frustrated right now. Things were going so well for me and now I feel like I've taken several steps back. On a personal level things are not great at the moment and it's affecting every other part of my life. I remember a while back, Sifu Brinker was speaking about people letting their Kung Fu deteriorate because they didn't have time or their life was sapping their motivation. What those people didn't realize is, when your life is chaotic or turning downward, that's when Kung Fu is the most important. I understood what he said back then but I'm sure not practicing that now.

I've been feeling "meh" for a while now but I had temporarily pushed it down. It's creeping back and I don't know how to deal with it. I still struggle with finding meaning in almost everything. I feel like an outsider wherever I go and whatever I'm doing, and it's starting to wear on me. I think I need to make some kind of change in my life but I don't know what. At least not yet.

Cory Smid
http://kungfucory.blogspot.ca/