I jumped over a huge hurdle on Tues. Well, actually I have been
jumping over it all year. There were 2 requirements that gave me the
most concern this year. Concern is saying it lightly. I have to be
honest and say that I was more like. . . . . angry and freaked out. I
thought that 50,000 push ups and situps was a bit much to ask, but 3
public demos and 1000 minutes of sparring was seriously over the top
pretty high expectations. They were expectations that I had no idea how
I was going to succeed at, because both of them, terrified me. I
didn't like feeling "forced" to do either. I don't like feeling forced
to do anything. I usually sink my feet in pretty hard and fight it all
the way.
I have been learning since white belt, that
when an instructor at Silent River Kung Fu raises the expectations of
me, I rise higher than I thought I could. Brings to mind 'Mastery'.
"One of the best ways, (to achieve mastery) is to surround yourself
with people who ask more of you, than you do". So far this year, I have
done 4 demos, and the year is not over. On Tues evening at the
sparring class, I completed 1000 minutes of sparring. This is a pretty
big accomplishment for me, and it feels good to know I did it. I
conquered my fear of sparring. I still get a bit nervous, but I do put
myself out there anyways, and have a positive attitude about it. On
Tues I got punched in the side of the head, and kicked in the pelvis
area. Yes it hurt, but I came to realize it didn't mean the end of the
world. This helps my nervousness a lot, as I learn that I can take a
hit and still go on. I know it's my age that makes me a bit hesitant as
my bones are not quite like they were when I was young, and injury is
an honest concern for me.
A huge part of the growth I
am grateful for, caused by my participation in the I ho chuan, is my
attitude. I say I felt "forced" to do these requirements at the
beginning of this journey. It's true, I did. I started with the
attitude that in order to progress in my kung fu, I had to do all these
things that I really didn't like to do. I had to do things that I would
never have done otherwise. I felt my life needed direction, and I felt
it needed some kind of purpose, plus a distraction from other life
concerns. So, even though I felt the way I did, I decided to jump off
that cliff and give it a try. And wow! Look at me now. It blows my
mind away to think that I actually did all that sparring, never mind the
4 demos. I feel far more positive about everything, and know that I
was never forced to do anything. The requirements were laid out, and I
chose to do them. No one forced me to. Sifu Brinker is a smart man,
and he knows what his students need, and for that I am also grateful.
Congrats on your accomplishments especially the sparring. Woohoo!!
ReplyDeleteCongragulations, cliff jumping (figurativly) can be a real blast (it's a lot of fun literally as well)
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