Darting on into the Public Eye

One of the most terrifying things for me that I have to look forward to with the I Ho Chuan is having to do demos. I have great anxieties over this and the thought scares me to death. I don't like this feeling and I don't want to have to go through this every time I have to do a demo. I have decided to prepare.

What I have done is slowly introduce myself with my dart to the public eye. The first I Ho Chuan class, I got to play around with my dart in front of everyone in the class, but not doing the form. (there really isn't enough room). I just tossed it around. That wasn't too, too bad because everyone was busy with their own weapons. The next thing I started doing was to pull out my rope dart and play around with it after the kids Tues classes. Then I moved up to Thurs evening at the I Ho Chuan get togethers. I am amazed at the difference I feel with my dart. I am far more comfortable doing it in front of people, and I actually do the whole form, rather than just toss it around, in front of others on both Tues and Thurs evenings. I don't even feel worried about the people that may be watching me.

Today, after the open training, myself and 2 other black belts were still hanging around when one of the black belts asked if they could see my rope dart form. Ok, so I am not so comfortable as I thought. This was somehow different. Because they were my peers? Because they were people I really respected and looked up to? Whatever the reason, my heart rate increased at the thought of doing it in front of them. I did it anyways, and it wasn't too bad. Then as I was about to do my form again, about 4 people came through the door from the renos next door. Now I really had an audience. I did find myself not as focused as I need to be when doing my form, and with the rope dart, focus is everything. After a couple times, I relaxed enough to ask for feedback on one of the techniques that I had been having troubles with. The feedback I got was very valuable, and I am looking forward to putting it to work this week as I practice. It was very much appreciated!

I really, REALLY, want to become comfortable doing my dart form, or any form, in front of others. I am sure it is like anything else. The more you do it, the easier it becomes. hhhhmmmmm. . . . why can't things just be easy the first time?