Fear of Commitment

Sihing Jon Robinson

I know what you're thinking and this isn't a blog about my love life. This is about my follow-through. I'm not talking about my golf game either. This is a blog on how I can't seem to stick to things. I'm not, of course, lamenting over my lack of magnetic powers.

What I'm trying to say is that I don't often finish things that I start. In my life's so far I have started many things and I leave behind me the evidence of a person with a short attention span. Picture, in your mind's eye, half-done crosswords littering my metaphorical path, hundreds of workbenches with thousands of projects wondering why their creator abandoned the so quickly, the husks of half-conceived ideas like road kill lining the highway. I was going somewhere with this, but I'll get back to my point later.

I've got a handful of finished things to my name. The reason for this is that I often leave things off and fail to return to them. Let's take this blog post for example: I actually started it and wrote about half of it before the weekend but forgot that I didn't finish and mentally checked it off as done. Luckily, I am finishing it RIGHT NOW and will soon take it off my huge "to-do" pile and set it in the tiny tray marked "done".

Another thing that I've left until later was getting my black belt. For two years now I've failed to finish what I started. This time I'll get it (fingers crossed), but that's not my point. Over all of these years of not finishing my training for black belt, I haven't stopped. With an endless collection of unfinished things behind me, I still dragged my kung fu along, never letting it fall completely to the wayside. There were times when I could have stopped but didn't. My effort hasn't always been the best, but even in my low periods I kept showing up.

I've been doing Kung Fu for 7.5 years and haven't given it up. I can't say that about many things in my life yet. Kung Fu is something special.