Out of My Comfort Zone

A week ago our kids came home with their report cards.  Our one son had a recent assignment which he had to write and present a speech in front of his classmates.  On this report card under the English heading were the comments complimenting him on his speech but with the added comment of ‘take a risk.’  As I read on, there was another of the same comment under another subject.  Along with the comment was an explanation of how he needed to feel more comfortable speaking in front of a group of people.   The suggestions of looking up and not at your shoes, slowing down etc. were given.   As we were talking about how the presentation went and how he felt, I tried offering some suggestions of my own for next time.  A little later that evening I got to thinking and realized, he is just like me. If I have to speak in front of people, I get nervous and I have a hard time getting my thoughts out (they sound much better in my head).  Even as far as participating in the Tiger Challenge, I have in the past come up with as many excuses as I possibly could every year, when in fact I was just a big chicken.  I have had a fear of speaking in front of people for as long as I can remember.  I’m not sure where it all started; I think it’s just part of who I am.  I would rather be a behind the scenes gal than a, here I am gal!  Since starting kung fu, I have had the idea that I would only go so far because I didn’t want to have to go out of my comfort zone and have to actually go up in front of a class for warm up or God forbid have to instruct someone else.  I had this line that I truly did not believe I could or would cross.  Well, I am taking baby steps as far as this challenge.  I know that the opportunities to get up in front of a group are good for me, even though I still don`t like it.  I did participate in the tournament the year before last, however, it was only because our one son told me he wouldn`t go in it if I didn`t.  Talk about pressure!  Sifu Shiplesky has very graciously given me the opportunity to go through portions of curriculum with students in the morning classes; I thank those students for their patience.   I have, when asked, done warm ups without coming up with some excuse.  In the last week as opportunities have risen, I have heard the words `take a risk`, and find it a push for me to go beyond where I feel comfortable.  I know this isn`t going to be an overnight transformation, but I am definitely aware that I need to and want to change.

Alana Regier